It never ceases to amaze me how we manage to get social issues turned upside down in our life. One in particular could very well be the single greatest problem faced by the next generation: Starting from childhood we reward and recognize mediocrity.
My 6-year-old plays T-ball, a game that consists of placing a baseball atop a tee and letting the kids hack at it until they hit it. Then they run to first base and wait to run until the next kid hits. There is no score kept, and every kid gets to hit each inning. On the surface, it seems like a good way to help them learn the basics. In reality kids learn how to dress like baseball players, wear a glove and swing a bat.
Ever have an employee who shows up dressed for the job and with all the tools, but not a clue as to what the rules are or what to do. You can thank the lessons of childhood for that. We give children trophies for showing up instead of teaching kids that they have to learn how to do something, practice their skills, compete with others and earn recognition for your success only when you win. The real reward is that you now know how to apply your knowledge, hone your skills and complete a task. This is fundamental to living a happy and successful life.
Kids intuitively know this. Parents concerned about their child’s “self-esteem” may derail their physical learning experiences by allowing them to apply these practices to video games. The only problem there is we wind up with introverted soloists with poor social skills. There is also considerable scientific evidence that winning in video games is easier than solving the problems of life. Many young folks — particularly young men — can encounter a few setbacks and fail to move forward.
It is certainly not my practice to complain about something without offering some kind of solution. In the past, we have had training courses and education for our employees. What may be needed now is a way to teach children problem-solving methods (without a game controller) that mimic the skills employees need. Rather than a trophy or public recognition, how about dropping a note in their paycheck saying something like, “accept this check as your reward for a job well done in solving X problem.”
A lot of experts tell us not to bribe kids, but I say why not? As a society we reward — or bribe — people with money to perform tasks that are key to running our businesses. There is no one more focused than my 12-year-old son performing a paid task. I see the whole thing as a win-win. He learns about economics (Dad pays less if you take too long to finish the task and Legos are pretty expensive), he learns skills that will benefit him later in life, he learns that he can do things well and he performs services that I would have to do myself. I am helping to create a worker for someone who will know how to pick a career he enjoys (because he will have tried lots of things) and understands that his income is a direct reflection of how he helps his company. Hmm, maybe making a better world does start at home.